Barney's Super Singing Circus 2000 Aired on ABC (May 16, 1980) Part 1
(Inside a car rental place, the French man notices the gang arriving) * Chuck: (to the man) We like to rent a car, sir. * Marcie: We would like to rent a car, sir. * French Man: Who will drive? * Marcie: He wants to know who's gonna drive a car. * (Snoopy arrives, wearing a fake mustache) * French Man: Please sign here. * (He is given the document, signing a paw on it) * French Man: This is the blue car in the parking lot. * Marcie: He says it's the blue car in the parking lot. * (Outside, Peppermint Patty grins a bit) * Peppermint Patty: That was good translating, Marcie. You would've been a great GI. * (Eventually, they come to the blue car, the ones getting in the car putting their belongings inside before Snoopy fixes the seat, jumping inside. He closes the door, starting the car up with the engine turned on. He pulls the choker a bit before shifting the gear to drive, hitting the pedal with Snoopy darting off) * (At the road, Snoopy turns where the arrow is pointing. Inside, Snoopy laughs a bit before stopping at another sign. They glance at the map nearby) * Marcie: Hang a right to row end, Snoopy. * (Just then, the cars smash behind the blue one while the French all shout in frustration. She comes to the hood, frowning at the ones shouting) * Marcie: (snaps) What's in your skull? * (Snoopy slaps his head a bit, making a pointy devil mark) * Marcie: Ooh, the horns! What do you want me to do? * (Snoopy gets on the hood as well) * Marcie: What a slab! * (Snoopy makes a chin wiping motion) * Marcie: Kiss my ass! Do you want to rub yourself with us? * (The other French people shout in frustration. The car starts up a bit with the choker pulled before Snoopy and the gang zoom off, leaving all the French men shouting in frustration while pointing to the cars. Inside, Snoopy laughs hysterically) * Marcie: (smirks) Oh, fucked up. * (Then, Snoopy whistles a bit before noticing other cars arriving) * Chuck: Where do we turn next? * Peppermint Patty: Do we follow the red line to the black line? (pointing) I think we're following the dotted lines. * (Later, the group tours through the countryside, looking at the French areas) * Chuck: (pointing) Here's Morville. You girls get off. Linus and I go on to the Heron and the Castle of the Bad Neighbor. * Marcie: The heron, Chuck. The castle. The Castle of Bad Neighbor. * Chuck: We drive to Abbyville, Langey, Loof, Chatel, Ambre. * Marcie: Moulin Rouge. Castle naked man. * Chuck: Well, whatever. If we reach a river called Andelle, we will be very close to where we're going. * (Later, the gang arrives to where a river is, stopping briefly as they see the signs "Andelle" and "Morville 10" nearby) * Linus: Hey, this is it! That's the river! And our first stop is Mordelle si Andelle. * (With that, the cars drive off, heading through the countryside) * Chuck: That's it! That's it! (reading) "Turn right from highway to the central Deville, turn right at the first intersection." * (They drive through the town and as he continues, the gang looks amazed at the town) * Chuck: "Drive through town to the first farm on the right." * Linus: Look, look at these old buildings. * (They slowly drive through before Snoopy's car begins bucking and bursting a bit before the car eventually stops, prompting the other cars to stop) * Peppermint Patty: Hey Chuck, the old car's collapsed on us! * (The frustrated Snoopy goes to the hood, looking at it) * Peppermint Patty: A fine mess you've had us in, Chuck. And just if I was beginning to get hungered. * (At that moment, Peppermint Patty notices Subway nearby) * Peppermint Patty: Hey, Chuck. (pointing) Look at that. Subway. We can get some submarine sandwiches. Great idea, Chuck. Run over and get us some bread. C'mon, Chuck, jump to it! We're hungered! Get some sub sandwiches and barbecue chips and soft drinks, Chuck. * (Inside, Chuck tries speaking French) * Chuck: A submarine sandwich, please? * (He points to the subs) * Chuck: Yes, sir. (to the clerk) Thank you all. * (He snatches the sub, though as he begins darting out, he collides with the door, causing the loaf to break. The sub is caught, puts together badly before the boy winces a bit) * Chuck: A...a...AH-CHOO!! * (The sub is thrown to the ceiling) * Chuck: Another submarine sandwich, please? (to the clerk) Thank you. * (He snatches the sub while glancing at the doorway, but realizing and turning the submarine sandwich the other direction. Just as Chuck leans the sub down, the hood Snoopy is fixing closes, making him shriek in agony) * Chuck: AAUGH!! * (Later, as the car is driving smoothly, everyone else, minus the annoyed Chuck, is eating their submarine sandwiches) * Peppermint Patty: (grins) This is great, Chuck. Very generous of you to give your share to the car. * (Snoopy snickers a bit) * Peppermint Patty: Notice how well the car is running since you gave it some bread? * (Most of them laugh hysterically at the boy. The group comes through the countryside before noticing someone waiting at a farm nearby. Eventually, the car stops) * Marcie: Hello. This is his farm to the house. * Boy: Good afternoon. Are you Peppermint Patty and Marcie? * (A few come out of the car) * Peppermint Patty: The fashion he drives, my friend Marcie and I are glad to be here. * (He holds out his hand) * Boy: I am Peter and I am very pleased to meet you. (shakes her hands) I wish to welcome you to my country. * Peppermint Patty: This is my friend, Marcie. She can speak French pretty good. * Marcie: Enchanting, Peter. * Peter: Oh, it's nice to know you. We are pleased to welcome someone who has made an effort to learn our beautiful language. * (He holds Marcie's hand) * Marcie: Thank you, Peter. We look forward to a nice visit in France. * Peppermint Patty: (pointing) These are our friends who came along. You'll meet them later. They have to get moving. * Chuck: (waves) Farewell. We're on our road to the castle. * Linus: See you tomorrow at school. * Chuck: Farewell. * (Eventually, the cars with Snoopy depart) * Peter: (concerned) Did he say "Castle"? Surely they're not staying at the Castle of the Bad Neighbor. * Marcie: Yes, they are. Bad Neighbor. * Peter: But that is horrible! They cannot stay there! * Peppermint Patty: Why not, Peter? * Peter: They could be in grave danger! * Marcie: (shocked) Danger?! * Peter: No one. Absolutely no one goes to that castle. If you are from another country, that's even worse. * Peppermint Patty: But Chuck received a letter from the castle! * Peter: And that, as well, is impossible. The baron would never allow such a fact. * Marcie: The baron? What baron? * Peter: (motioning) Come, we must see if we can do something. * (With Charlie Brown and Linus, Snoopy drives down the path while looking at the map) * Chuck: Stay on this road, Snoopy. We should run into the town pretty soon. * (He notices storm clouds gathering around) * Chuck: I sure hope we find the castle before dark. * (Later that evening, as more clouds gather, Linus frowns to him) * Chuck: Look for a sign that says "The Heron". It should be only 4 or 5 kilometers. * (Then, rain pours down. The rooftops close with an umbrella on top. He turns on the wipers, which wipes the windows a bit. However, Woodstock looks before turning the switch, turning off the wipers) * Chuck: Look at that. The wipers are stuck. * (The car stops with Snoopy getting out. He groans, trying to move the wipers. As Snoopy fights, Woodstock looks at the wiper switch, turning it on. Just then, Snoopy shrieks, being pulled with the wipers before flopping to the ground. After Snoopy enters the car, the car chokes before zooming off with Snoopy frowning at Woodstock, whom looks sheepishly at him) * Chuck: (notices) Hey, here we come to a village. Slow down, Snoopy. * (The cars slow down as they look around) * Chuck: This is the town. This is the heron. I saw the sign. (pointing) And look. That must be our school. * (As they pass the town, they notice a French pub as they pass behind it with Snoopy hollering) * Snoopy: Yes! Now we can get drunk like the French do so! One fact these Frenchies did right for once! * Chuck: (glancing) Just a kilometer or so pass the town, there will be a nursery. After the nursery, the next road is it. There it is! * (He points to the garden nursery) * Chuck: There it is! See the greenhouses past the nursery? Slow up, Snoopy. * (He looks at the greenhouse nearby) * Chuck: Now look for the road to the left. * (Thunder smashes down before they notice the road to the left, stopping) * Linus: This must be it, Charlie Brown...although I can't see any castle. Boy, it's getting darker. It's getting kinda spooky.